So I think I do a lot of thinking. And with those thoughts, I usually involve Facebook and google, because I google a lot. Pre Facebook, I involved my journal with all those thoughts and sentiments. Then, in a short amount of time I was using Facebook as an outlet. I don’t like that, or maybe I do like that? The point is, I miss my journaling; I loved writing and the passion and literally tears I could put on a page. I would say Facebook took that from me, but the truth is, I did it. I let it happen, so i sacrificed an entire year of journaling for posts on Facebook. Can I print them all? Yes. But it will not be easy. And everything I can put there, I’d rather have here or in my nightstand burried in a journal. Because in those places I can really express my thoughts without limitations or fears.

I write and talk a lot about setting examples for my child, and for others. I write that we all need to do it. So here I go, about to try and do this, and maybe it will be good for someone else. that’s silly, but who knows. Sadly, or rather, pathetically, I think it will be hard. Losing that social outlet won’t be easy for a few days. I still have my brothers page, because it seems like a piece of him, my running friends because they update me in races and training clinics, my teacher friends (of course) and my business. Everyone else has my email, my blog, phone number, address, or I have theirs. Sorry family.

I have uploaded all my pictures to my walgreens acct and plan on backing them up again to my shutter fly. I used Facebook for that, but I won’t anymore. I will still post a pic or two, but that’s it.

I’ve been considering this for a while, but now I have a real reason for it. You ever do something just to see if you can do it? That is part of this, I think. I LOVE keeping in touch with my friends and right this minute having people tell me no, I can’t get rid of my facebook makes me sad… Is that pathetic? But honestly, it’s so much to keep up with, which sounds RIDICULOUS, I know. But id rather be writing quality stuff here or in my journal than trying to put a little something everywhere.

And I owe my family more. I owe myself more. STUPID, I know. Crap, it’s just Facebook. But it is also time. And time does ad up; I’d rather use it in other ways. And not just writing, I mean obviously, but the goal is to fetch from the computer all together, as a whole.

I’m going to start a list in our family planner and my journal of my topics of interest or things that make me want to write, and I am going to go from there. Not professionally or anything. I’d rather put that energy and time, if I’m going to use it to communicate to others, in a meaningful place where I have room to really express what I’m thinking. Meaningful to me. Another reason is because here, it’s not popping up on other people’s screens or emails forcing them to read it. Here, you have to consciously come to the blog and read it, see my story behind the “status” and so forth. Everyone can still post comments, it is just less connected, so the people who really don’t care, aren’t getting a piece of my life like it is just another part of their day! Here is even more personal than Facebook, which is too personal for me to use as a journal because it is so casual; making sense? Stupid I know… Jtom would probably say he is glad I got rid of most of Facebook, but thinks my reasoning is dumb. Ha. But he doesn’t know yet.

But anyways. This week I have a hundred things I wanted to blog about come into my head. Rather than jot them down with a note in my journal so I could put it on paper (or screen) later, I’m sure I just ignored them or threw it on a status and forgot about it.

I used to journal every single night. Thats what I did in bed before I went to sleep. It’s how I unwound from my day and got things off my chest. But instead, for the last year or two, I’ve used Facebook for that. However, rather than write it all down, feel better and move on I read comments and look at who has liked it and then reply to comments and tag people and it just goes on and on and on. I think it’s great for some people who can use it occasionally and not need an outlet. I need an outlet and as long as I have the Facebook up I’m afraid it will be my sounding board, and I dont want it to be.

Now, I have written a RIDICULOSLY Long blog about how I’m incapable of using Facebook properly. SEE WHAT I MEAN?!?! Lol. One thing leads to another… I will miss my weekly fantasy vacation dates with a dear friend, talking with acquaintances from high school about meaningless gibberish jabber, and sharing the joy of pregnancy photos of friends from far away. But it will be fine, because chances are if we communicated so much in fb, we communicate in other ways already! 🙂

Now, let’s see how long this will last.